Theredheadedbibliomaniac

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Anna Karenina – I don’t hate her but also don’t love her.

The Book is amazing no doubt giving commentary on Politics, society, culture and more importantly position of women in society.

Pregnancy and thoughts on women on it, gives an interesting insight on the inner working of the mind of women.
Political situations
Then the social unrest
Infidelity
Love
Hate
Economic problems
Friendships etc etc

Can you like a book when you don’t like one of the main characters of the book ??

I myself went through a phase when I hated Anna
Then I felt pity for her
And then in conclusion i still don’t like her.
And
I will say
I don’t feel pity for her.

The other MC is so less talked here and on all the other places
And he had some great character build up all throughout the book ?
But still he is not talked much
Why
Because, Anna is praised so much that all other characters are left in shadows

We think so much about Anna
Study her so much and
(wrote 3 posts about her)
That we don’t think about others

I think its coz of the title of the book, We she is only MC and she is important without realising the space Levin has in this 800 pages book

One thing I want to say
“Feeling pity for someone who couldn’t get out of their bad situation is different than feeling pity for someone who got her way every time and still cried.”

Anna is amazing character but as always MC will definitely have flaws and people will still like her. I loved her courage to do what she wanted but few things that she did put things into perspective. it makes us think what we would have done differently.
.
.
*Spoilers ahead*

What bugged me was that her husband was a good person, focused more on work than spending time with wife yes but does that mean that he is a bad person who deserves to be cheated on ?

no right ?

But yes she had not planned and it happened she got some attention and she took it. can we blame her ? yes definitely. She was bored of her life so she decided that its ok to do what she did.

then she was dying and her husband took so much care of her and did so much for her that when she recovered she couldn’t even look at him.

what she did next was shocking for me really, she left him and also her son behind and she and her lover built a life in Paris. I don’t know i was really shocked. i was getting some pity for the lady and here she the stupid thing again.

They came back and built life in countryside she did well for herself there and things were going good. But again she started feeling alone and also a bit unsecure for herself coz lover was spending time outside more. The height was that one day she told him their kid is ill to get him back and one she again left ill kid behind.

Yes she was being selfish but many will call it taking care of herself but truly she was taking care about her personal needs about her pleasure.

here i would like to add few things. which is that when women sitting home whole day have no work they will either feel lonely, worthless, insecure and will have thoughts which will find no solution.

Here i am not talking about the women who have household work or some other work that do work from home or even those who watch their phones no no. Just women like Anna who have lots of maids and who don’t have to do any work. what will her empty mind make her do.

So in a way we can say that Tolstoy showed it well. That women need to do some work or at least something that will let her mind work. Otherwise all this will happen. No, I don’t mean that affairs will happen. I mean that thoughts and then why husband is out only not coming home and stuff, then doubts and fights. If she was busy enough she wouldn’t need the missing companionship when she cheated on her husband.

Coming back to Anna. She doesn’t want to take of her crying baby but uses the reason of baby being ill due to which he didn’t came the last time when she had called him. Men don’t stay home when they can go out and do something its universally accepted fact ( now a days women also don’t stay home).

Somewhere by the end we feel that she had some mental issues but I wont blame anyone else for her condition. I understand what she felt and hopefully no one else should feel that way.
We have the example of Dolly to compare Anna with right
Yes everyone was against her but dolly was there with her, her partner was there.
And
Anna was responsible for her situation
Like Dolly was responsible for her own.
Even Dolly’s husband cheated on her but dolly didn’t take any drastic step
She thought of her kids. Yeah many will call it self love but I wont, it’s not self love when men go out by leaving family at home and its not when women do it.

Anna’s husband and Dolly’s husband both were not that close to their kid/Kids
Still Anna decided to leave the kid behind (so much to be called caring)
And
Dolly couldn’t do it
Yes she had more kids but she could have done something else
She had her rich parents.

Again it’s like what steps you take
How you see the situation and
Every situation is different
We can’t judge someone for their act
And
We can’t judge anyone for their favourite characters. ( sometimes I came close to think but then I stopped myself maybe they thought from different perspective)
But sorry I still feel how Anna can be someone’s fav character
For the courage of course
I appreciate the courage she shows
But I do not like her or feel pity for her.
Or in a way she showed courage.
I feel pity for Her husband (who was not all mad in the beginning just ambitious) and Vronsky who lost everything
And
For Dolly for her life.

The one other character who is side-lined by many and I do appreciate the kind person he is and still I am not talking much about him
Yes Levin and kitty also was also quite good and well suited for him.

If I would ever re-read this one it would only be for Levin to know him more.
Only if I could read Levin’s parts and
Not Anna ..I really can’t read her part once again.

She is described as so many things
She did feel bad for her acts I agree
But still
Can you forgive leaving one kid behind and then crying but not taking care of another one who is there with you.

I will say again
We have many examples of the women who faced worse than her
And still were not selfish
And I feel pity for them.
But not for Anna.

Featured

Life in Mumbai..before Corona

To sit at the marine drive after office time was one of the best memory of those days..
I used to wish that I would sit there and read..
Hope those days comes back soon

The one thing any Mumbaikar would have missed in whole lockdown was definitely the sunsets at marine drive.
Well geographically I am not a Mumbaikar, I live a bit away from Mumbai..
But college, office and all the time we spent out of house was in Mumbai itself..
The trains of Mumbai were my lifeline too ..
Hence from heart I was always a Mumbaikar ..
When I had to meet my school friends I never knew where to go in Kalyan..
All I knew was Mumbai ..
I never knew the stories of Kalyan..
Slowly since last two years I came to know more about Kalyan..

I think I miss my office but truly it’s that daily journey from CST (now CSMT) to Nariman Point which I miss..
That sitting alone at Marine drive in the evening..
Having the Naturals Ice-creams..
eating that spicy food ..
Laughing and clicking crazy pictures on the roadside..
Playing with the Dogs of people who came for walk ..
Going to Marine drive in office break coz it was raining ..
Eating Aram vadapav before catching the train..
Looking at those book stalls at fountain was early morning ritual..(and ofcourse buying them in evening)
Now it seems that waiting in traffic for half an hour to reach office would have been better than sitting home for 24hrs..

Due to office I have also travelled in train at 5.30 am and also at 12 am and at both those times I found the train fully packed 😄..
Once I told one of my bookstagram friend (who stays outside Maharashtra) that I am going for walk, it was 8 pm ..she said be careful it’s late.. I didn’t tell her anything then but now I think she will understand after reading this..

I am not saying it’s the best city I am just saying it’s everything for people who lived here..
There are many cleaner city and city without slums in India as well as in Maharashtra and they are good too..

It’s like different people different tastes..
There are many people from Mumbai itself who love Pune more than Mumbai..
I know there are many people here on bookstagram who love the quiet and peaceful cities but
Everyone knows that people from Mumbai find it difficult to live anywhere else..
According to me there is only one other city in the world than can quench the thirst of a person deprived of Mumbai ..😄
.

Finding Peace in Nature: A Window to Birdwatching

It’s that time when everything is silent, yet the birds are chirping, calling their loved ones home after a long day of work. The two sparrows in front of our window are sitting on the tree trying to find food on the branches. I think I should put out food, it’s late, I know, and what if they won’t eat coz I am still sitting here. Sitting here, turning off the noise of the fan and muting all other sounds, I am just listening to the sound of different birds.
There is a small area in between the two compounds of the two complexes. It is like a no-man’s land. Disputed or no one knows who owns it, but truly it’s the Birds and trees who own it, and a few animals. Sometimes we get Monkeys and Mongoose; otherwise, it’s all cats and Dogs with rats. When I shift my table towards the window, the view is directly in front of me, and I love studying here, and I love sitting here for coffee or even to read, yet I do most of these things in my room, as I don’t want disturbances in what I am doing. My room also has the same view, but the window is smaller and the Books are in front of my Window.
Today, I also sat here as there is no one at home. Had my streaming hot chocolate, and just looking out is also the feeling we can’t lose. Half my time goes into taking pictures coz I want to capture the exact moment perfectly, but what my eyes see is something that couldn’t be put in pictures.
It’s the view and the chirping that make you forget all your worries of the day, or month, or even the year. Slowly, the creases on my forehead start to straighten up, and I relax more and more. Focusing on the sound of Birds, I only know of the Crow and the Sparrow; the rest all sound I can differentiate, but can’t say the name.
I try desperately not to turn on the light. It’s still light outside, but the insides are getting darker. How ironic, for us to get light we need to go inside, coz outside it’s all darkness.

Mom who made us a “Reader” – Mother’s Day Post

Very Blessed are the kids who have mom
And
And much much lucky are the ones whose mom reads
.
She reads from a really young age
In school she was in Marathi medium
She learnt how to read and write Gujarati
And
She also learnt English a bit from school
And
A lot lot more
From Books.
.
She would read any book she could get her hands on
Books from schools
From libraries
From the house of neighbours
.
One of her neighbouring Grandpa was an avid reader and used to bring books from the Marathi library then used to give it to my mom..
He knew she would read it in a day and then he would read it 😂
That Grandpa had a lot of but books at his house too and she would go there anytime and would pick up any book she wanted.
.
Always her father got books for her chandamama books from whenever he went to Railway station.
I remember those stories she would tell
They would be waiting for their Father
Whenever he would go to
Drop someone at station
So that he would bring the Children’s story books from the stall there ☺️
.

And that was not it
You give you anything and pamphlet also and she will read it from top to bottom
Believe me many would think what’s there in a pamphlet or a wrapper of Peanuts (we get it wrapped in newspaper)
Yes even those she reads
And
Till dates she reads them
Now she spends more time on Netflix though 😂
At the end we all love stories right

.
Like many Bookstagram women worry that their kid might never read.
.
My mom had that fate
I was not a reader till very late
.
My mom used to read a lot during her pregnancy too
she used to get me books
My Masi used to go and get Books for her to read during pregnancy
Like my mom had got for her aunt when she was pregnant (the cycle went on)
And
She also read a lot after I was born
I was also given many story books
She would read to me
In hope that one day i might read them myself
.
My dad and mom both got me many books
Some stories I have read
Sometimes half
Don’t know
.
I had also joined the library with my mom
She would get Marathi कादंबरी and i would get some kids story books
But i wasn’t that indulgent in that too
Read a few and then mom would read
And
Pass it on

My mom’s own Grandfather had a good collection of Gujrati and Marathi Books
And
She had read many from them too
She
Also had a lot of books
Which she would give to someone and it would never return
.
She definitely felt sad that it didn’t come back but
Her view is that it’s good, someone is reading it
.
She likes to pass on things
Even our toys she gives away once we grow up
Or
Our favourite dresses which we would think of keeping it for ever
But
She would say
“That Watchman’s girl will wear it use it and
Toys you are not playing at least someone will play with it.
Don’t get attached to everything
Learn to let go. Coz someone needs it more than you do ”
.
Me and my sister definitely feel bad about it
But we understand her thought process in it.
.
Many of the books
She got for me in childhood is given to someone in the hope that they will read them someday
.
Later on my mom also felt and I also felt that we wanna collect our books
And
We now keep them
..
When I am here my sister and mum take care of my books at home
.
My sister was always a Reader
Since childhood and she reads fast also
I would tell mom I read faster than her but mom would say ya you also read fast after but she needs encouragement to read more 🤭
.
My mom has been the second mom to many.
Being in a joint family we all are close to our Aunts.
Like I am close to my Aunts
And
My cousins are unofficial real sisters to me .
We all together have learnt a lot from Mom’s, Aunts, Masis, Nanis, Dadis and Mom’s Masis.
These all figures have taught us something
.
One of those is
“whenever you feel like doing something meeting someone and you get time to do it.
You just do it.
Don’t think much
Coz whole life you do things for everyone else
This ones
This afternoon you need to go out do something for yourself
You just do it
And
While doing it forget about the pain that you get from running your household without any praise”

.
All these Mom’s and Mom like figures are the ones who have together made us like this
And
Hence we always have high hopes from Mother in Laws 🙏
.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mothers of Bookstagram
And
To all the Book Mommies out there…🙌
.
You are doing great ❤️

Problem of Fake Book Reviewers on Bookstagram

The Mess in the Mind

Some things you can’t explain

Some you don’t want to explain

And

Some that you can

They don’t want to listen

And

They say Freedom of expression is enough.

In a way Freedom itself isn’t enough

It was never enough and it will never be

Coz if anything was ever enough then we wouldn’t be living this life wanting for more and more every day.

The ones dead are the most satisfied people ever

Coz unless you are satisfied you won’t die peacefully.

Expressing was always difficult for me

Expressing in words

They say you wanted to write then why haven’t you written yet

But they forget that you never got that peace to sit and think peacefully.

Coz only peace can mitigate chaos.

Yes, it can Mitigate but yes never end it.

Its not easy and it never will be

But I am meant to do something

And

I am sure I will.

Check out the image below.

Like the above image which looks perfect from outside but truly it isn’t perfect. You won’t know what’s inside anyone the outer shell will always be perfect. And if you know what’s inside consider yourself lucky.

Coz there might come a time when you won’t know anything about the person anymore..

Anna Karenina and Dolly …..

“Everybody Lives everybody enjoys life”
.
Said the woman who was mother of 6 kids
Who was from one of the biggest families of Petersburg.
Whose Husband was in government & having affairs here and there.
Who loved here children but also wanted some time for herself
But not ready to accept it.
Who was shocked when someone suggested they won’t have any “more” children.
The woman who was worried about poverty and raising her kids while husband was philandering away.
Who was always worried about her sisters and friends and had to take shelter with one of them coz husband couldn’t provide for much.
Who had to wear clothes with patches so that she could save some money for her 6 kids.
The one who was devoted to her husband and he cheated on her.
But
Now she is scared to think of leaving him considering children
But now she did think of leaving him .

Not sure whether she will do it
But she surely knows that
Even the Muzhiks (Phaesant)’s wives were also living life.
And
She wasn’t

And that is why she was ok with what Anna did
I also felt that Anna had a great amount of courage to think about her happiness instead of what people will say.
It’s difficult for me to just say no
But what she did was too great for that period.
Definitely she didn’t do the best thing and when she still says that she hates her husband i be thinking “Who the hell is she to hate him”
All he did was to be devoted to his work
His love language was different.
And after what she did his behaviour was not the worst. And She hates him 🤷

She has one admirable quality
She decided to choose herself over others and that’s something
and that does take some courage
And
Believe me men do take care of what they want and they do it anyhow
Women think no what will others say if they choose themselves 🤷.

Only if women are strong enough to say no can they beat the Patriarchy

Just yesterday I read a quote from
Henry David Thoreau
Saying
“Disobedience is the true foundation of liberty. The obedient must be slaves”

And I totally agree with it
.
I wanted to show one more different theme that Tolstoy included in his book
I had not expected the topic of pregnancy

Anna chose not to have more babies to keep Vronsky attracted to her and how Dolly felt for a bit to stay away from kids but the next day she was back with them.
But the thought did come right.
The thought to be free the thought that maybe she could have had less kids and husband would still be with her

Dolly was attracted to freedom and thought it was bad to leave kids behind us Surely a sign of an ethical person and what we call human behaviour
But will we call someone thinking of their freedom alone an inhuman person

How I see now why people don’t actually hate her
They like her courage
Which many of us still lack 🫣
Courage to follow her heart
Courage to live life on her own terms
Courage to fight for herself.

Not many would have done what she did with that courage
But definitely ppl need courage to do many small things
Which are not unethical and inhumane

It’s great that i wrote my thoughts about her and the book from time to time.
It made me understand how it changes as the character development takes place.

Wonderful book no doubt.

This post was me still having 20% to finish. Next is the one I wrote after i finished reading the whole book.

Anna Karenina and Infidelity

The age old Question, whether infidelity is justified in any circumstances ?

The answer to which will make us understand why is Anna Karenina glorified so much. ?

Would a book be glorified if it was a man who was the main part of Infidelity ?

Also makes us question whether the people who love Anna Karenina won’t mind being part of Infidelity?

The situation in which Anna was, i.e. the loveless marriage and a marriage with no passion, is something that we see a lot in India and have been seeing since time immemorial. But the Instances of Infidelity are close to 1% in such circumstances as only rich women or the women who married rich have the time and energy for infidelity.

Most women don’t have time to think about it. They don’t have maids to do household work. They don’t have Nanny’s to take care of their kids. They don’t have a housekeeper. And no one to take care of the inlaws and relatives. Women here are all of the above doing ungrateful work all day long. If they get some time they would love to have some time to sleep or to do something they like.

Let’s consider if everyone was rich and they had a lot of time to think about someone or time to go to parties and meet someone more passionate than their husband. If they had all that how many of these PPL will indulge in Infidelity and will it be justified?

Infidelity in any way is not justified. Even when the husband is abusive and not that great of a human being.

But here the husband still thought of Anna’s need for money even after her acceptance of her infidelity. Was it because he cared for her or was it because he still wanted to keep a hold on her ?

He still wanted to be married to keep up the facade in the eyes of society. Earlier also it was a facade for Anna. The marriage where only she was unhappy. He was very happy with how their life was.

Trying to think how it would be if Anna was a Man instead. Because I have seen people like it when women take revenge from the Man who cheated on her. In that case they again side with women. Even if she was manipulative.

One thing is for sure if a book was written about a Man who is cheating on his wife and all his problems then i don’t think the book would be that successful as this one is.

To like a book is a different thing and to like Anna is a different thing altogether. I do like the book as of now but I did not like how Anna came into an extramarital affair. She wasn’t fully guilty and it is shown that she was falling in love and getting attention. As far as her personality is described in the book i feel that she would be centre of attention of many parties.

The thing is i have seen women who do get a lot of attention from other men and they are still loyal. And do like the women who stay loyal in the circumstances. Her husband was not manipulative or abusive. We can understand the extramarital affair if the husband was manipulative or abusive even though it would still won’t be acceptable but we would understand that they do deserve the happiness.

Coming back to Anna, didn’t she deserve the happiest ? Well she was not totally sad before the affair. She was happy lady. Yes there was no passion there was no excitement which comes with new relationship but there are many people who don’t get all that and still they are faithful and happy in relationships with their husband.

If we say that Anna actions are ok and all bad then how can he justify the women who are faithful with manipulative men ?

I know in the book the men who had affairs had different lives than Anna and we do feel pity for her (little bit). But we can’t say that it’s not wrong when women do it because she isn’t given the leniency to carry on with the affair in regular life.

I have not read the book fully yet and I am sure I won’t be liking Anna anymore than I do right now.

But I do feel the book is misunderstood in many ways it was not written to show how the lives of married men with affairs and married women with affairs was different.

I think It wanted to highlight Levin and Anna. How Levin dealt with his life and how Anna did..

I still do not understand how people are siding with Anna maybe I don’t like it because I have seen worse marriages than her. And in olden times morals were much more in demand right that’s why no one has courage to get divorce but If divorce was looked down upon then it’s obvious the affair would be too.

I do understand Anna and how her life was but nowhere I feel that her affair was justified. I do feel sad about her married life but do not feel bad about being outcast when she had an affair. The men who had extramarital affairs were not treated that way then it is society that is wrong but affairs can never be justified.

I will have more to say once i finish the book. See you soon. Till then let’s see whether you can change my mind about Anna 😉

“We all are bad in someone’s story”…. You really believe in this bullshit ??

All I can see is an excuse for not feeling remorse for your bad behaviour or not asking for forgiveness.

I have also done the wrong thing or things in my life but I feel sorry about it whenever I think about it. I don’t just let it go by thinking everyone is wrong in someone’s story

That’s utter bullshit.

If you have done something wrong have the courage to accept it and yes to face it for your whole life.

It’s not like if you say sorry once it’s over. No boss, it will come back to you again and again in many different ways which you can’t even think of. But you have to face it accept it and only then you can move on.

I don’t think you will get peace by saying ‘that everyone is wrong in some way so just leave it, instead of sorry i will say this line and get out of the situation’

Coz I know you won’t feel peace by using this saying. I have seen such people. When I call out how bad this line sounds they attack back like it’s me who made mistakes and not them.

Yeah so definitely they are not at peace even after accepting this quote.

Atonement is the only option. By actually saying sorry multiple times and most importantly actually feeling sorry 🤷

Nothing can get you out of your sins other than your acts of atonement.

Someone who has affected the mental health of many is now asking for their own mental peace …and it is affecting my mental peace ..

How do you feel pity for someone who has affected the mental health of people for many years…?

But now they are suffering it seems or are they ?

Does posting on stories that they are suffering prove that they are …or is it attention grabbing stunt

Does unfollowing everyone mean you are getting peace of mind but then you are keeping your account public so that people will give you attention

Can we think of it as the fruits of their karma ?

Even after thinking that it doesn’t give us peace …

Someone is suffering because they made people suffer and still we don’t get the closure

And why is that ?

Because they don’t understand that it is the fruits of their behaviour. They feel no guilt towards their actions.

Even after saying sorry we see no change in their behaviour. There is just the outer shell that shows the respect, what’s there inside eventually comes out. Coz saying sorry doesn’t mean that you changed.

Also your sorry won’t rub away our trauma. It just doesn’t go away that way. Even when we see your lookalike everything just comes rushing back .

They do not understand why it’s happenimy to them..On the other hand they are like why me what did i do wrong. They never realise why the bad things are happening to them. Only if they realised that they made a mistake then we would be at peace we don’t want them suffering. We just want them to understand how it was their mistake and feel for it.

Count it rant or just sharing thoughts …I thought like posting and here i am.

What’s the best time to post on Instagram to reach more people

Have you thought that a particular pic is not good enough for your feed ?
What makes it good is the look or the setting of the pic, light, brightness, aesthetics ..?

Well if I spend a lot of time on a particular pic I think it deserves to be up there
Isn’t my time important ?
Why should something which is good for me can’t be up there ?
Why should something be good to be looked at by people at large ..?

Have you ever thought why do I have to post according to particular times?
Why can’t I post when I feel like it ?
It’s my page
My happy space
But there are restrictions
Put by us
And
That is what stops us from doing what we want to do ..
.

I am doing it as a hobby not something to earn from
But
Even if I was doing it for extra earning, I would definitely do it on my terms
Why do people do their own business ?
Or
Why are you self employed ?
To do what they want to do for themselves at their convenience ..

Not to follow orders or rules made
By someone we don’t even know
So if I want to be self employed by this page
I would make my own rules and do what makes me happy…
.
This is how I would be happy so I would do it
.
If you are happy with rules then I am happy for you ❤️

But if you are not happy with following these rules then you have to think
If doing a job and having your own page both require following some rules, then what’s the difference ..?
I know it’s not about rules but you got my point ..
.
.
Just to let you know
You don’t have to follow the herd.

You can have an un-aesthetic page,
Without any theme and still it would be good
Coz that makes you happy .
If it’s your page
Do what makes you happy ..
.
I felt all this when I was new here.
To get accepted in a community people try to do things they don’t like.
.
I love many pages with aesthetics and
Also many pages with random pics
If you love to follow rules go with it
If not
Just do what you want
.
Also if someone want to post at a particular time then don’t ask them why ?
They want to follow it let them do
It makes them happy
I do post at particular time in some days
And
Many times I just can’t wait to post if the pic is beautiful 🤭
.

If you are sad and not doing what you want even when self employed then i don’t know what to say anymore..